I’ve decided that the best way to explain adoption to those outside the triad is to compare it to an organ transplant. Being adopted often feels to me like being a transplanted organ: without being asked, I was removed from the body to which I belonged and implanted in the body of a whole new family.
Typically, when organs are donated, the recipient must take drugs daily to ensure that the organ is accepted by the new body. Even then, sometimes these things fail, and that’s after loads of testing has been done to try to ensure a perfect match.
Depending on the organ, sometimes the donor can live without that part and not notice much difference; other times they live on, but with a diminishment. Obviously, in some cases, the donor is dead, or close to it, first.
In no case is organ donation painless.
In no case is receiving a transplant easy.
And that’s when the organ is just a part of a person, rather than a whole human being.


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